Supreme Court Judge Wants To Retire Constitution To A Museum

We caught up with United States Supreme Court Justice, Chuck McGavel to hear his argument on why the American constitution should be retired to a museum and no longer referenced as a legal document. According to him, "The reality is self evident, just go through each amendment point by point and you will see how outdated the amendments truly are."

1st Amendment (1791):

Guarantees the right to the freedoms of speech, press, and religion. Protects the right to petition the government.

If freedom of speech is still valid, explain the pressure to ban the Tiktok social media platform for broadcasting views not popular with the establishment.  

If freedom of the press is still valid, explain the pressure and lawful harassment of independent journalists who report unpopular narratives or opinions. 

If freedom of religion is still valid, explain the daily normalised Islamophobia over the past few decades.

2nd Amendment (1791):

Guarantees the people's right to own and bear arms for their defense.

The purpose of owning and bearing arms was to stand up against a tyrannical government. In the days of cannons and muskets, that was reasonable, however in the age of modern warfare, what are people's Desert Eagles and Colt 45s going to do against Reaper drones, F-16s, aircraft carriers and nuclear carrying submarines? Either update the amendment where if I have Bill Gates money and I want to purchase a fully loaded Reaper drone, then so be it!  Or scrap the amendment all together.

3rd Amendment (1791):

Citizens cannot be forced to quarter soldiers during times of peace.

Why would citizens quarter soldiers in times of peace when soldiers have been all too comfortable quartering themselves in the houses of 3rd world black, brown and yellow people?

4th Amendment (1791):

Citizens cannot be forced to subject themselves to seizure and search without a search warrant and probable cause.

How amusing LOL. Have you seen an average traffic stop? The first thing the officer does is search your vehicle and commands you to open the trunk of the car whether you like it or not.

Explain the legitimacy of the Patriot act and how it makes sense or compatible with the 4th amendment?

5th Amendment (1791):

Prohibits abuse of governmental authority in legal procedures. Establishes rules for indictment by eminent domain and grand jury. Guarantees the due process rights. Protects citizens from self-incrimination and double jeopardy.

Then why was Michael Jackson pursued on the same crime multiple times?  Why the relentless pursuit to get O.J. Simpson and lock him up no matter how insignificant his crime was?

6th Amendment (1791):

Guarantees fair and speedy jury trial and the rights to know the accusation, the accuser, and to find counsel and witnesses.

So why are there detainees in Guantanamo Bay detention camp sitting there for decades, indefinitely and with no charges?

Why are US citizens getting struck by drones in Yemen without a trial?

Why is there a dual legal system, one court system for the rich and another one for the poor?

7th Amendment (1791):

Reserves individuals' rights to jury trial depending on the civil case, and cases already examined by not be re-opened by another court.

Seems like a repeat of the 5th and 6th amendments. We already have Budweiser and Bud Light, now we need amendment strong and amendment light?

8th Amendment (1791):

Forbids exorbitant bails and fines and punishment that is unusual or cruel.

How is well off individuals paying baby mamas thousands of dollars per month in child support not a cruel and unusual punishment?

How is well off individuals paying baby mamas thousands of dollars per month in alimony payments not a cruel and unusual punishment?

9th Amendment (1791):

Reserves the rights of citizens which are not specifically mentioned by the U.S. Constitution.

i.e. to paraphrase the 9th amendment, "We as law makers are too sloppy and too lazy to list all of the rights so this is the etc, etc, etc… amendment."

10th Amendment (1791):

Reserves powers that are not given to the U.S. government under the Constitution, nor prohibited to a State of the U.S., to the people and the States.

So why is the federal government mandating nationwide gay marriage and abortion rights if it’s not their business?

11th Amendment (1795):

State sovereign immunity. States are protected from suits by citizens living in another state or foreigners that do not reside within the state borders.

Seems irrelevant, why sue a state when you can a sue a state’s specific institution which violated your rights?

12th Amendment (1804):

Modifies and clarifies the procedure for electing vice-presidents and presidents.

Have you recently taken a look at, “The procedure for electing presidents and vice-presidents?” Let's take a look at the Democratic Party's procedure.

What about the Republican Party's procedure? Spoiler alert, it is not any better than that of the Democrats. 

The whole procedure has become a high school pep rally with grown adults acting like teenagers.  

13th Amendment (1865):

Except as punishment for criminal offense, forbids forced-slavery and involuntary servitude.

Then explain why are illegal Mexicans picking all the fruits and vegetables with no labor rights or protections from exploitation of any sort?

Explain why are H1-B visa holders and employees are tied to their employer and cannot change their jobs?

Why is it that students skipping school is considered a criminal offence? Forcing them to show up for eight hours a day and five days a week seems like involuntary servitude.

14th Amendment (1868):

Details Equal Protection Clause, Due Process Clause, Citizenship Clause, and clauses dealing with the Confederacy and its officials.

Isn't President Donald Trump cancelling birthright citizenship?

Didn't Secretary of State Marco Rubio make a deal with El Salvador's president to send American citizens to their prisons?

15th Amendment (1870):

Reserves citizens the suffrage rights regardless of their race, color, or previous slave status.

What's the point of voting or suffrage rights if the popular vote doesn’t decide an election but the electoral college does.

16th Amendment (1913):

Reserves the U.S. government the right to tax income.

i.e. legalised theft; and how did the government function for 200 years before the establishment of the IRS (Internal Revenue Service) anyways? 

17th Amendment (1913):

Establishes popular voting as the process under which senators are elected.

Go back to the commentary on the 12th amendment. This procedure of holding pep rallies to elect politicians needs to be modified or revised.

18th Amendment (1919):

Denies the sale and consumption of alcohol.

Outdated and later repealed.  How dare you touch our brewskies!

19th Amendment (1920):

Reserves women's suffrage rights.

Go back to the commentary on the 15th amendment. This procedure of the electoral college and making up rules as you go along to elect politicians needs to be modified or revised.

20th Amendment (1933):

Also known as the "lame duck amendment," establishes date of term starts for Congress (January 3) & the President (January 20).

For Pete's sake, it’s called the "Lame duck amendment;" the amendment itself states that it is useless.

21st Amendment (1933):

Details the repeal of the Eighteenth Amendment. State laws over alcohol are to remain.

Self explanatory - brewskies are back!  And look at that, the 21st cancelling out the 18th, it's like this document is trying to shorten itself. 

22nd Amendment (1951):

Limit the terms that an individual can be elected as president (at most two terms). Individuals who have served over two years of someone else's term may not be elected more than once.

So if a president does a hella of a job for 8 years, rather than continue for another 4 or 8 more awesome years, we'd rather give the job to a brand new nobody with no track record that will probably undo the 8 years of awesomeness that the previous guy did, is that right?  Makes complete sense!

"Hey Mr. President, congratulations!  You exceeded all expectations in your 8 years at the job and your reward is, you’re fired!"

23rd Amendment (1961):

Reserves the right of citizens residing in the District of Columbia to vote for their own Electors for presidential elections.

Go back and revisit the commentary regarding the 15th and 19th amendments. 

24th Amendment (1964):

Citizens cannot be denied the suffrage rights for not paying a poll tax or any other taxes.

Go back and revisit the commentary regarding the 15th, 19th & 23rd amendments.  And what the hell is a poll tax anyways? 

25th Amendment (1967):

Establishes the procedures for a successor of a President.

You actually need an amendment that says if guy number one quits or goes MIA (Missing in Action) then guy number two gets the job? As if that was not already common sense?

26th Amendment (1971):

Reserves the right for citizens 18 and older to vote.

Isn't this just a rephrase of the 15th and 19th amendment and combining them together? Talk about being redundant.  

27th Amendment (1992):

Denies any laws that vary the salaries of Congress members until the beginning of the next terms of office for Representatives.

Outdated! Those lizards found a loophole anyways through insider trading. Congressmen and Senators are doing better than professional stock brokers on Wall Street.

"And there you have it!  The US Constitution needs to be retired to a museum," says Supreme Court Justice, Chuck McGavel.